more in the novel, daydream nation

1-21-05
the day after the inauguration. Sitting in the back of the sprint store. Nice to be able to sit. Looks like i'll be here for a while. Some job security. I seem to be thinking about sex a lot, more than i thought, but i do like L., not just in a physical way? Or maybe not.

i can't eat that apple right now. Need water. Back to work.

As she read i would fuck her: various books, once the old testament, the torah, maybe genesis, later chapters. Said it was like a perfect male fantasy as I licked, fingered, sucked, and fucked. I felt left out: she never read aloud.

Waiting to see no exit,

now in this moment listening to fatboy slim's version of magic carpet ride. Tall skinny blonde made me a chocolate heart. Hell is...all you have to write about is your unhappy childhood. Horrors. Tomorrow i want to buy glitter and stars, but mainly i want to hang out with miss lenina crowne.

asian tattood goth goddess. What can we have and what can we avoid? I don't really like the christian or jewish bible. Kerosene. White chocolate heart of red gold. I saw her monday night and felt fat.

What are the other characters doing, and why? Good question. That will take some researchin'. Some searchin' for locations and motives.

the laughing gas

listening to black steel, tricky, on the 22, at night. Seems she blew me off on my cell today. I was pretty upset. I must like her. She is staying in oakland, for now, at least, staying with her sister who just had a baby. It felt like a paper cut on my eyes, reminded me of the endless bullshit with R. But maybe not, could be different.

How does all this relate to vr, nano, I dunno.

Staying out of relationships, in order to maintain that autonomy, for the story, the narrative, this language. To be authentic. An odd idea, extreme, yeah. Oh yeah. Where is the linearity, how do we find it?
Happily a member of the climbing gym/community, at least moreso, today. Climbing with stoners, wonderful friends, lovely backs all around. Muscles, talking to D., listening to Peter Gabriel, I don’t know how to stop.
As much as I liked being single, dating has a pull. I like someone once I get to know them, let them in. It’s nice, that closeness. Experimental film. Where in the system are we? What nanode? In the virtual wire, high guage, where is it?

new idea for novel/blogs

well, here is my new idea. I want to start working on my novel again, and in order to do that I may have to cut back or stop writing in my livejournal blog. I dunno. So I decided to combine the two and also to post my novel progress in blogger and my experimental writing tribe. Three forums, opportunity for readers and feedback. Of course I will also put it in word. I want to write something tonight, but soon I will post a synopsis of the first 500 pp or so of this rough draft (who knows maybe I am starting another novel, I never know).

But first I will hotsynch my clie, before I forget.

so tonight I went to Dark Sparkle which is a block from my apt, Church and Market. Premier San Francisco Goth club. 80's, mostly, and 70's music. Nothing new. Lots of "costumes", corsets, leather, wonderful. Went by myself. Which is good. It works, for movies, restaurants, coffee shops, museums, and goth dance clubs. Rad. I danced. It was fun. It was beautiful. There were beautiful women and cute guys. Lovely. Some 80s throwback styles and shit I did not dig, but that is their deal. I guess the goth stuff is going back a ways too, maybe, but I was not part of that scene then so I wouldn't know.

A long, manic day. Physically, very active.

Keep in mind this is an uber rough draft. Am I insane for doing this? No one would dispute that. Things are not always as they appear. Is that a theme or what?

three great bands

saw three great ones at the Independent tonight: the album leaf, rum diary, and roots of orchis.

roots had dj shadow with extra energy vibe.
rum diary had mix of joy division, curve etc.
album leaf was cool mix sometimes reminding me of old floyd teched up.

all in all a good show.

the album leaf

I swear I am going to post something here

because I will not abandon this blog completely. It is off the chart related to my tribe profile and Livejournal blog, but it could be relevant. Links, etc. I need a theme. Something to write about, like the Advanced theory blog. I need a theme! what could it be?